I received this via email a couple of years ago. Whoever wrote it certainly helped a lot of people, because knowing how to comfort people who are experiencing loss, is a wonderful thing. We always want to help but are sometimes unsure of what to do or say. After reading this, we'll know.
Wise sayings often fail on barren ground; but a kind word is never thrown away.
- Arthur Helps
Sensitivity to others often comes at considerable expense. Ask those who have lost a loved one or some aspect of their life if they are now wiser regarding what helps and what hurts the grieving heart. They will know:They will explain that God's love reaches out most tangibly through people who understand that:
*they are not required to fix the hurt.
*curiosity is not the same as caring.
*a gentle touch can mean more than a great truth.
*God understands our questions and even our anger.
* a listening ear brings more comfort than the wisest mouth.
* people don't hurt less just because you tell them someone else hurts more.
*similar experiences give empathy but we can't know exactly how another person feels.
*people who add practical help to their prayers are an answer to prayer.
*words of love are words of encouragement.
*small acts of kindness are not small.
*all of the Scripture we know may not need to be quoted right now.
*losing one's balance is not the same as losing one's testimony.
*it takes time to live our questions all the way through to God's prayers.
*time alone has no power to heal- God alone does.
I wish I knew who wrote the above. I would like to let the author know how much his words helped me. I've suffered loss several times. It never gets easier, but this author's willingness to share his knowledge is a blessing.
We do learn from our trials. We could not show compassion except we first experienced deep pain. Kindness, humility, gentleness and patience are things we come to possess after walking through fiery trials. We discover, through our own hurting, how to reach out and comfort another hurting person.
I want to thank those of you who have reached out to me (you know who you are). Your comments and messages have shown me that I'm appreciated, and loved; that you are there for me when life throws me a curve ball. Please know I'm there for you as well.
Stay well, be happy, and remember that every day is a gift of life from the Giver of life. Let's not take Him for granted.
Can you imagine yourself in a hammock, eyes closed, the breath of the morning breeze kissing your skin, its touch soft as a butterfly? I can, and often do. Imagination is a wonderful thing. It can take us anywhere we wish to go, whether that be Paris, Jerusalem, Greece, Mexico, or New York.
Some people have told me (when I was younger), that I needed to grow up and act my age; needed to put away childish things and stop daydreaming so much. It made me very sad, made me feel as if they were asking me to stop being myself, and in a way they were.
Children's imaginations help them cope with difficult things. It helps them stretch their comfort zone, allows them to be themselves, to have fun and be creative. My imagination helped me endure painful and humiliating experiences. Whenever I was hurting, I'd imagine how it would be later on, when things were better, calmer- when the adults finally managed to settle their differences. Imagination got me through the roughest part of my life.
I didn't spend much time with my father growing up, so treasured the times I had him to myself. One day he took me with him (I can't recall where we were going, but do remember our conversation). We'd just driven under a bridge and I said. " "Dad, how many boxes of oleo could you stack from the ground to the top of that bridge?"
"Not sure. Quite a lot, I imagine."
"One hundred?"
"Maybe."
"More?"
"Don't know."
"Less than a hundred?"
"Not sure."
"Well guess."
He changed the subject. I asked next, how far away the stars were, what made them so bright, asked how the man who made our car knew how to make it. I asked him where rubber came from, and how come we have to call a chair a chair. I asked who invented paint, and how come the water we drink is a different color than ocean water.
After a short while he began to get very frustrated. He didn't get mad, just sighed and asked, "Doesn't your mind ever shut down?"
I guess it doesn't - hasn't - and I'm an adult now. A car passes our house and I wonder where the people inside it are going. I wonder if they are happy or sad, if they believe in God, or don't, if they still know how to have fun. I wonder how they view the world, wonder if they can still see it through the eyes of a child
I go shopping, and notice every thing and everybody. I wonder if the lady in front of me realizes what a good example she is setting for her little girl, by being so patient to the rude checker.
I go to the park and see a couple sitting quietly on a bench nearby; notice the way the lady is sitting, head down, kind of hugging herself while gently rocking back and forth. I notice the way the man is patting her shoulder, but not looking at her. He is staring into the distance, a sad look upon his face. I find myself imagining the worst of things going on in their lives, find myself grateful, though I'm not sure why, that it isn't me on that bench.
Imagination is a wonderful thing. Sometimes it even helps us find solutions to problems, helps us come up with a new and different approach, one that just may work this time.
Keep on dreaming. Don't ever give up your dream. Some of the most beautiful, wonderful, delightful things in the world began with that first step. We don't enter the world knowing all things, but are capable of learning many new things.
Well, sunshine found my hiding place this morning; no wind, no snow, no rain today. I hope, wherever you are, you woke to something that lifted your spirits too; if not the sun, than perhaps knowing how loved you are, that your daily needs will be met, that you have a best friend, PLUS a brand new day offering you a DO OVER. Gotta love that!
Life is short so create a beautiful memory today.
love you much,
Barb
