Monday, January 30, 2012
HOW TO HELP THOSE SUFFERING A LOSS
I received this via email a couple of years ago. Whoever wrote it certainly helped a lot of people, because knowing how to comfort people who are experiencing loss, is a wonderful thing. We always want to help but are sometimes unsure of what to do or say. After reading this, we'll know.
Wise sayings often fail on barren ground; but a kind word is never thrown away.
- Arthur Helps
Sensitivity to others often comes at considerable expense. Ask those who have lost a loved one or some aspect of their life if they are now wiser regarding what helps and what hurts the grieving heart. They will know:They will explain that God's love reaches out most tangibly through people who understand that:
*they are not required to fix the hurt.
*curiosity is not the same as caring.
*a gentle touch can mean more than a great truth.
*God understands our questions and even our anger.
* a listening ear brings more comfort than the wisest mouth.
* people don't hurt less just because you tell them someone else hurts more.
*similar experiences give empathy but we can't know exactly how another person feels.
*people who add practical help to their prayers are an answer to prayer.
*words of love are words of encouragement.
*small acts of kindness are not small.
*all of the Scripture we know may not need to be quoted right now.
*losing one's balance is not the same as losing one's testimony.
*it takes time to live our questions all the way through to God's prayers.
*time alone has no power to heal- God alone does.
I wish I knew who wrote the above. I would like to let the author know how much his words helped me. I've suffered loss several times. It never gets easier, but this author's willingness to share his knowledge is a blessing.
We do learn from our trials. We could not show compassion except we first experienced deep pain. Kindness, humility, gentleness and patience are things we come to possess after walking through fiery trials. We discover, through our own hurting, how to reach out and comfort another hurting person.
I want to thank those of you who have reached out to me (you know who you are). Your comments and messages have shown me that I'm appreciated, and loved; that you are there for me when life throws me a curve ball. Please know I'm there for you as well.
Stay well, be happy, and remember that every day is a gift of life from the Giver of life. Let's not take Him for granted.