Wednesday, February 22, 2012

A Tribute To My Sister, Jacqueline

 It is a hard thing, hearing that your youngest sister died. When you died, honey, a part of me died too. The first image upon my mind when I heard the news, was not how you looked today, but how you looked when you were a little girl, pretty much like the little girls above. You were sitting at the side of our house, in a pretty pink dress, that was now all mud stained because you were making mud pies. Your talking blue eyes fairly danced as you held a pie out to me, wanting me to taste it. Your Shirley Temple dimples, deepened when you smiled and talked.
You were such a beautiful thing, like a little doll, almost. You didn't change much as you grew up, except you grew more beautiful, and not just on the outside. You married and had children. I married and had children too. Your marriage turned out to be a good one, my first one didn't.You were there for me whenever I needed you.

I miss you already, but am so grateful that I can take a million memory walks and visit with you any time I want too, and I will. I'll remember the time I spent a week with you, and while there discovered that I could write stories, so wrote a special one for Johnny's and my 16th Anniversary. It was so much fun typing out a few pages, then taking a coffee break and sharing them with you. You were so proud of me, so amazed that I could write such things, even more amazed than me, I think. |

I'll remember the two of us putting on a record, then each of us writing out whatever came to us while listening to the music.
I'll remember the word games we played, the hours we'd spend at your kitchen table, talking about everything from bugs to religion. I'll remember the kindness you bestowed upon me when Johnny accidentally tossed out the story I'd been writing on, the first one. I was so crushed that I was unable to write for a long time, didn't even want too. Then one day, you sent me a precious email that said, "Sis, about the lost book. Let it go, Barb. What you lost was words on paper, but the story is still in your head and upon your heart."
Those few words have helped me more times than I can say.

Jackie, you and I had our differences, as sisters sometimes do, but beneath it all we both knew that love was there- love and the desire to be united again. It hurts to lose you, but in all the ways that count I've not lost you at all. You'll remain in my heart and we will see each other again. The loss is so painful, honey, but I am so glad that you are no longer hurting, no longer sad or having to struggle to simply make it through another day.

I could have chosen a different picture for this entry, but as I said, the first
image that came to my mind upon hearing that you were no longer with us was the one of you as a little girl. Goodbye, sweetheart. I shall always love you, always miss you.


Sybil said...

Thank you for putting into words what a lovely sister you had..
much love Sybilx

ADB said...

My sincere condolences, Barb. Words are but a poor effort to convey my sadness. At least she is now beyond pain and suffering. I wish you strength in weeks and months to come, not in the least on account of other family members that I know give cause for grave concern.


Donna said...

I'm so sorry. May God comfort you in this time of loss.

Robin said...

I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your sister. Sending prayers and hugs your way.


Kath said...

Awwww Barb,I was just closing down and the notification came through my inbox.Know I am heartbroken for you Dear Friend.You too are just as beautiful as your Sister was Barb.I am so sorry you have lost her.May perpetual light shine upon her.Our condolances to you and everyone this affects.Love you millions.Memories cannot be taken from us.Safe in the arms of Our Dear Lord Barb.No more suffering.Night Night and Godbless to you and Johnny and your family.May God be with you at this very sad time..Love Kath xx

Sandy said...

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious sister, Barb. It is good and right for you to remember all the wonderful times you had growing up and even as married women, mothers. I lost both of my sisters years ago so I know the pain. In time it does go away but it's a slow process. God is the great comforter and lover of our souls and I know He will comfort you now.

Astra! said...

So sorry for your sad loss. Sending Prayers xx

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

What a wonderful tribute to your sister. You are in my thoughts and prayers at this time of deep sorrow. Saying good bye is never easy, but you do have some wonderful memories to keep in your heart.

Dianne said...

Dear Barb,
I am so saddened to hear of your loss but rejoice in the relationship you had with Jackie.

I am so glad God gave us a memory--who could have ever fathomed such a beautiful creation except Him.

God be with you and bless you, dear friend.

Sandisan said...

((Barb)) speaking as a sister, I know how close the bond is. What you wrote is so close to how I feel about my little sister, her name is Barb. I also know that we will all meet again in a better place and that love never you Sandi

Nelishia said...

What you wrote touched my heart so deeply. She was sure lucky to have you and I'm sure that she felt your love. I hope that someday if I go first that my only sister will remember me in such a lovely way. Just know that my prayers are with you and your family tonight for peace,comfort and strength.

Kathy said...

Barb, May your sister rest in peace and may you find continued comfort in your memories. Kathy

Linda's World said...

I never had a I can only imagine the pain you're feeling at this time. I pray that time and your memories help to heal your heart.

Lainey Laine said...

Barb I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I'm glad that she's not suffering anymore. Beautifully written. Xxxxxx

Anonymous said...

Beautifully said, and my prayers to you. May God richly Bless you. She is in a better place where someday we will go, I am confident of that.