Wednesday, November 23, 2011


Isn't it odd, the wonder of trials?  Expressed this way it does not seem to make sense, but to me it does. My worst, most painful trials revealed to me that I am much stronger than I believed myself to be. These particular trials helped me learn patience, strengthened my faith, renewed my courage, and drew me even closer to the Lord.
     I was thinking, only yesterday, of  how wondrous a thing faith is; that if kept in steady motion, every day, how much more content a man could be.We think, during the darkest moments of our lives, that nothing will ever be the same again; that nobody seems to care; that even if we get through this trial, another one will take its place.We think these things because that's what we tell ourselves, and what we tell ourselves, we believe.
     My husband being on hospice, is probably one of the most difficult things I've had to endure. It has turned our world upside down, blown such a hole in our comfort zone that for a while, we were scrambling for something to hold onto. We felt like leaves in a storm. It was horrible. Still is! The difference I think, is ACCEPTANCE. 

      When my Johnny first told me "The doctor says he's done all he can do honey. Hospice is next." I instantly went into denial. This couldn't be happening. Not to my Johnny, the love of my life- my best friend. I resisted it, unfortunately, for a week or so. And my resisting made it worse.  I didn't get back on track until I went to the Lord for help. He gave me  Bible verses that I've been leaning on ever since. These verses have removed every WHY question I've ever had- or that comes up.

 What are the Bible verses?  Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8

 (1) To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the
(2) A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up
       that which is planted;
(3) A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build

(4) A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
(5) A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to
        embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
(6) A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

(7) A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to

(8) A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
These Bible verses  lightened my burden by explaining WHY the painful, sad, depressing, horrific things happen in life. They happen for a reason. They reminded me of something I'd forgotten; that life runs on opposites: A baby is born- a baby dies; a man gets a job- a man loses a job; a couple gets married- a couple divorces; a family buys a home- a family loses their home.
Understanding how things work simplified my life.
Romans 8:28 says

" And we know that all things work together for good....."

Many of us know the above verse, but when a really heavy, painful, trial comes, we lose our footing. We're so focused on the pain, the sadness, the enormity of our situation, that we totally forget the one word in Romans 8:28, that makes the difference. The heart of the verse is the word ALL.
    This means, using myself for example, that even though I am overwhelmed at the trial I'm facing, feel intimidated by it, feel fearful at times, and uncertain, I can remind myself, during my devotions, or when hurting the most, that ALL things are working in my behalf; not just part. I don't have to understand it. I just have to believe what the scriptures say.  God has more than proven himself to us. We have no reason to doubt, no matter what happens.
     I wish to testify of God's greatness; of His mercy,His compassion and understanding. I wish to share my love for Him, my appreciation for the greatness of His heart, for His continued giving of HIS strength, so that I am able to bear all things.
    May all who read this post experience the warmth and depth of His love, the honor of His presence, and the tightness of His embrace.


I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

It is amazing what trials can do to us and for us. We have experience some hard things here in our family especially it seems in November and our faith carried us through too. For every season there is a reason. It's true. We can't understand them sometimes but we do trust that all will be well in the end. I'm sending lots of Love and Hugs your way today.

Sandy said...

Even in the midst of this horrible and trying circumstance, the evidence of the fullness of His presence in your heart is so encouraging. Your walk with the Lord is a blessing to all who read this blog.

Kath said...

Without him Barb I do not know where I would be.I accepted a long time ago.There is reason for everything.Trust in The Good Lord and he will give us stregnth to endure anything.God Bless you Barb and prayers from me always for you and yours,through these hard times.Love you. Take Care God Bless{{HUGS}} Kath xx

Linda :) said...

Wishing You and Johnny a Very Blessed Thanksgiving... Love you both dearly... :)