Small Boy- Huge Blessing

I'd been sitting at the computer for several hours, updating journals and answering mail, when I got an email from a friend. She asked me to pray for a little boy who has cancer." He's just five years old." she wrote," and his Grandmother is very worried about him."
   
I wrote her back, asking  her to send me the Grandmother's email address. As soon as I received it, I wrote the grandmother, asking her to tell me about her grandson. The letter she wrote me was long and quite sad. Her love for her grandson was so great that the very thought of losing him was making her ill. "I can't sleep," she wrote, "and can't keep food down much either. I cry all the time. My precious Marco (her grandson) is my heart. He has been in and out of the hospital, Barb, since he was three and a half. The cancer went away but came back again, six months ago. The chemo is not helping much. He is wasting away, is nothing but skin and bones. "
 
  I asked about Marco's parents. She wrote "His father cries almost as much as I do. His mother is like a zombie, just walks around the house, doing things that need to be done, then sits down and stares into space. And Marco's little brother, who is three, keeps begging to see Marco. But Marco won't see him. He gets hysterical if asked to see his brother. He says "I'm ugly now, with no hair. I don't want my brother to see me."so the parents don't make him. They try to keep him calm as they can.

"Barb ( the letter continued). "This  is so hard. What will I do if my sweet Marco dies?  I don't know what to do to help him. He looks like a little old man; never smiles any more, doesn't talk much, just gets more depressed."
  
Sleep became rather elusive once I began writing Marco's grandmother. I kept thinking of this small child, so loved, who was dying a little every day. I prayed about it; asked God to bless Marco and his family, and to help me find a way to lift their spirits. He did.
 
I  bought two big bottles of Bubbles, 1 smaller bottle of Bubbles, and six fancy Bubble wands. I also purchased a miniature Bambi.  Angels must have delivered Marco's present, because it seemed I barely sent it, when I got a thank you letter from his Grandmother.
 
"Dear Barb. I can't thank you enough. I wish you could have been here when my sweet Marco opened the gift you sent. He is very weak, and the medicine he's taking makes him  very sleepy at times too, so when he got the present unwrapped, it took him a few minutes to realize what he was looking at. He was too weak to open the bottle of bubbles, so I did. I dipped a wand into the bottle, then waved it back and forth. Bubbles were everywhere, BIG ones as well as little ones. Marco's smile, Barb, lit up the room. He said,"Let me try, Grandma." I held the bottle, while he dipped the wand. When he waved it back and forth and saw the bubbles, he laughed, Barb...for the first time in many months. And not only that, he said, "Go get Anthony (his little brother)
so he can blow bubbles too. And the sweet Bambi, Barb, he plays with it all day, and at night, when he goes to sleep, he places Bambi on his pillow. "

A small gift, bubbles, but what huge blessings came out of that gift. Marco's grandmother tells me that Marco never runs out of Bubbles. It has become his favorite thing. This happened three years ago. Marco is now eight, has thick, curly hair and runs and plays like any other eight-year old boy.
   
And Bubbles? I keep many bottles on hand. I take some with me when I go anywhere; hand them out to kids, to people sitting alone on a bench, to family members, to neighbors, to anybody who crosses my path. Sometimes I sit on our patio, and blow bubbles. Try it. Silly as it sounds, you just may surprise yourself- just may enjoy being a kid again.

Why not purchase a few bottles of Bubbles for yourself. Keep them on hand- haul them out when

you are lonely, feeling a little blue, or just wanting to lower your stress level. Hand them out to strangers. It's  amazing how such a small thing as blowing bubbles can lift one's spirits.

 

First Impressions Are Not Always Right

People matter to me, so I go out of my way to understand them; to learn what makes them happy, angry, sad, disappointed, hopeful, depressed, or fearful. I try to learn what makes them feel good about themselves, hate themselves, get to the point that they want to give up. I like to know why some people are so successful, while others struggle just to make ends meet; like to know why some individuals have dreams and set goals, while others set no goals, don't even have a dream.
 
What I know about people, including myself, is that their inside seldom matches their outside. It is wise to look behind angry words. An angry person is usually a hurting person.

A smile doesn't always mean a person is happy, and tears don't always mean a person is sad. People who don't cry are oftentimes seen as cold, but  often it's simply their way of keeping strong. It happens sometimes, that if you've cried openly, shared that deep sorrow, and got put down for it, were criticized and ridiculed, you no longer cry; or if you do, it is when you are alone. As well, many hurting people are afraid to let themselves cry; believing that once they start they might not be able to stop. I have felt like that many times.
  
We all influence somebody, every moment of our lives, but just don't realize it. We're influenced by another person's confidence, their strong faith, their talent, perhaps just their ability to express themselves. We're influenced by those who climbed to the top, when others failed to believe they'd be able too.
 
People wear masks; pretending to be happy, when they aren't, pretending to be alright, when inside, they are falling apart. They pretend to be satisfied with their looks, but in reality hate themselves, always wishing they were different.

People pretend to be strong because others tell keep telling them how strong they are. It never occured to them to just be honest and say."Look, I"m not feeling so strong today. I am really afraid, or insecure, or feeling lost and misplaced, or worse, losing the desire to live. Could you stay with me for a little while, or call me?"


People have become cautious, find it difficult to trust. Our world has become such a dangerous place that  many have chosen to make a fortress out of their home, becoming increasingly fearful to venture out of it. Their comfort zones have shrunk.
Where once they covered a huge amount of space- it now covers  very little, usually only includes a trip from home to the store, to a relatives house, a doctor maybe, and to church. Some people are even afraid to enjoy their front yards. It is wise to be cautious, but a mistake, I believe, to let those who are evil have such control over our lives. Bad things happen to good people sometimes. It hurts, but it's true, But  in the  end, I know that everything will one day be made right.

I can say this because man is not in control. God still is.

For prayers, encouraging words, good wishes, and the unexpected cards and letters.

Diamonds & Pearls

I woke up this morning with a particular song on my mind. It's been playing steadily for over a week now, so thought writing it out would perhaps slow it down a bit. Just kidding. This song is one I don't mind playing a lot, even if it's inside my head, and not on a turntable.
  Do you remember this song?
 I got no diamonds, got no pearls,
Still I think I'm a lucky girl,
I've got the sun in the morning
And the moon at night.
That's all I remember, but it's enough to keep me smiling. How could I not? Diamonds are gorgeous, sparkly things, but very expensive too. And pearls are not cheap. But without possessing either of them, I consider myself very rich.
 
I am rich because I have the sun to warm my bones, the moon to enable me to see God's nightlights, which remind me that HE is always on call, always there, should I need him, and I always do.
 
I am rich because my life experiences have taught me to be brave, to hang tough, when the ground is pulled out from beneath me; to hang tough when I'm disappointed, to hang tough when I'm misunderstood, or unjustly accused of something. My life experiences have taught me that love once given, is never wasted. They have taught me that forgiveness is possible. All I had to do was say the words, then ask the Lord to help me mean what I say.
 
  I'm rich, because I understand that it's never about who I am, but WHOSE I am.

 Many of you, I'm sure, are having to cope with a lot; have problems that weigh heavy upon your heart as well as your mind. I'd like to remind you that every trial comes to its own end. And as long as you keep a tight hold on your faith, you'll be okay.

I may not have walked in all of your shoes, but have in several.  I understand how difficult it is to deal with chronic pain, how it feels to hurt or be misunderstood. I know what constant criticism does to one's self-esteem, know how heavy lonely can be. I know the sting of betrayal, being almost homeless, being out of work, having problems with your children. I know the pain of having loved ones struggling with addictions, and how it feels to have death steal a loved one away. I know too, what it feels like to feel alone, though you are surrounded by people.
  
It's not always easy to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it pays to believe that it exists- that you will see it down the way.
   I always tell my children that "Attitude is Everything." It pays to focus on the Up- side of things, rather then the Down side. I tell them too, that the choices we make, or don't make, determine, to a large degree, what kind of life we'll have, how each of our "Today's" will go.
 
  If you're having a good day  embrace each moment, for time passes swiftly. If your day is not going very well, make the decision to look for the blessing in it. Trust me. There is one.

   My prayer for you today, is that you don't let the day pass without spending out what God has given you. Every one of us has something that can, if we share it, uplift somebody else. It may be something as simple as thanking somebody, or as great a thing as forgiving somebody you've not been able to forgive. I pray that each of you will remember how unique and precious you are; that nobody can be YOU better than YOU.
 
  Well, I've rambled enough. Just wanted to share that song with you, and wish you an awesome day. Keep smiling, keep humming that tune, keep trusting and believing that your turn will come. And  keep loving the unlovable, forgiving those difficult to forgive.
After all, isn't that the way the Lord always treats us?

LETTING GO

This wonderful poem has helped me make
wiser decisions without feeling guilty.
It is my prayer that it helps you too.

 Letting Go

To let go doesn't mean to stop caring,

                                                 it means I can't do it for someone else.
                                                  To let go is not to cut myself off,

it's the realization that I can't control another.
To let go is not to  enable,
but to allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness,
which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To let go is not to try to change or blame another,
I can only change myself.
To let go is not to care for,but to care about.
To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To let go is not to judge,
but to allow another to be a human being.

To let go is not to be in the middle arranging the outcome,
but to allow others to effect their own outcomes.
To let go is not being protective, it's allowing another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny,
but to accept.

To let go is not to nag, scold, or argue,
 but to recognize my own shortcomings and to correct them.
To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires,
but to take each day as it comes.
To let go is not to criticize and regulate everyone,
but to try to become what I  dream I can be.

To let go is not to regret the past,
but to grow and live for the future.
To let go is to fear less and love more.

-Author Unknown.


Have an awesome day. Remember,
life is short so create a beautiful memory.

Good Morning, Guys & Dolls

I had a neighbor ask me "Are you always this happy?" My answer was yes. I have no reason not to be. I have the Lord with me every day. My body is still working for me in spite of health issues. I have family members enduring hard, painful situations, children who have lost their way, and a husband whose health is failing, but I never forget that my worst day is the kind of day some people face every day, with no friends, no love, and no support. There is always somebody worse off than me.

I am loved, have people in my life who believe in me, in my goals and in the dreams I hold so tightly too. I am content with what I have and have learned not to take life, or myself too seriously.
 
I've also met some compassionate, caring, loving, supportive people, here on the Internet, people who take time out to email me even when they're busy, or going through hard times themselves. They have no idea how much they have blessed me, how much those unexpected notes uplift and encourage me.

 I am able to spend time alone each day, which strengthens me, helps me remain focused, and enables me to have a quiet mind and a peaceful heart. Solitude also enables me to hear more clearly, that which the Lord would have me hear.
 
 I've learned, but not easily, how to live in the present moment, rather than waste time looking over my shoulder, longing to relive what once was. I hope that you are happy too; that each morning you are able to see the many blessings God sends your way, and that you're able to recognize and appreciate
the unique, and special individual you are.


Well, July 4th is just around the corner. It offers us opportunity to share so much with family and friends, to create special memories that will, down the way, see us through our more difficult times.  Have a wonderful time. I'm not too sure what we will be doing on that day, but know new memories will be created.

                                      DON'T FORGET TO PRAY FOR OUR TROOPS.


 
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Regarding Betrayal (a requested repost )

I have a dear friend who emailed me a few days ago, saying, "Barb, I need a favor. I shared with you that my marriage was in serious trouble, had been for years. And because of the lack of communication and how tall the walls between my wife and I were, I strayed. I didn't mean too. It was, at first, a genuine mistake, one I regretted so much I determined in my heart to work hard at my marriage, especially since we have the four children. But my efforts didn't work. My wife still loves me, doesn't want a divorce, but I do. I care for her but am now in love with this other woman. My favor? I need some advice. Do I stay, miserable as the situation is, for the sake of the children, or do I leave?  Please get back to me ASAP.

I sent an instant message to my friend, asking "Do you wish for  me to tell you what you want to hear, or to be honest?
He wrote back "  Hard as it may be to hear, I wish you to be honest. I trust you."
My Reply:
 
Dear,
First, let me tell you how sorry I am that things have gotten so off the track for the two of you. I've known you both for many years, know you both to be decent, caring, loving people. But things happen. The ones we love are imperfect, make mistakes,.just as everybody else does. Sometimes those mistakes are so small they wouldn't make a ripple in a pond. But other times, mistakes made can be very harmful, spilling hurt upon not jut the one who made the mistake, but to all who love and care for that person.
    I am no authority on this kind of situation, but have experienced betrayal twice, so DO know a great deal about how it touches everybody, especially the children. Do I think you ought to stay, miserable as you are, or leave? That question is one you have to answer yourself. But the advice I will give you, is advice, that I truly believe if you follow, will make it easier for you, and for your wife.
  Ending a marriage is a sad, painful thing, especially if your spouse still loves you and wants you to stay. Life offers no easy answers, my friend. When something this serious comes up,  you must  address it head on.  I have been betrayed twice, as you well know. You know too, that because I turned to the Lord for help, this marriage has been saved. We've been together for almost 37 years now, and never been happier. I have reminded you of this because I don't want you to forget, that should you choose too, and truly want to make your marriage work, God would bless you and help you do that. If both parties want it to work and God is in the middle, it will work.
    
Now, regarding what you should do. You ask if you should go or stay, for the sake of the children. The best way to make good decisions on anything, my friend, is by asking ourselves the most difficult questions, the most painful, but honest questions we can think of like:
1- If I leave my wife, will I be able to handle the guilt I'm going to feel?
2- If I leave my wife will I be able to live with the damage it is going to do to our children?
3-  Will I be able to endure my children pulling away from me, being angry at me, thinking I don't love them anymore?
4- Will I be able to handle the many  questions my children are going to throw at me?
3- If I leave my wife, can I handle what this will do to her since she has always treated me so well, treated me with such respect, always looked up to me, been my best friend?
4- Have I taken the time to think about the history of our marriage, of all that my wife and I have been through together?
5- Have I taken time to consider the many times she has forgiven me so quickly, been merciful when I didn't deserve it?"
6- Have I considered how little I know about the woman  I now claim to love? Unlike my wife, I don't know how she'd treat me if I were really sick, really stressing out, lost my good paying job. I don't know  how she will be about me seeing my children, me still having contact with my now present wife.
 
The above questions are but a few you need to ask yourself. I'm sure, if you take time to do it,  you can think of many more. The more questions you come up with (honest, painful ones), the  more sure you can be that your decision will be the right one.
    My dear friend, I suggest that when  you have  time,  and can be alone, imagine yourself without your wife. Imagine (really imagine), how it would be without her, to not hear her laugh, to not see her smile, to not share meals with her, not  to have her as your best friend any more. Imagine how you would feel if something happened to her, how you'd feel not being able to talk to her about what hurts you, like you once did. You two were very close once. I know that people have told you "well things change. People fall out of love sometimes."
  True as that may be, I believe it is also true that love between two people does not always die. It just gets buried when  people forget what brought them together in the first place; gets buried beneath health problems, financial problems, in-law problems, priorities in the wrong place, problems with the kids, etc.
  
 I would like to point out something to you, left it till the last, hoping you will not easily forget it. You asked should you stay, miserable as you are for the sake of the children. How, dear one, does staying, under those conditions bless your children? What do you think the tension, angry words, shouting, threats, demands, broken promises, will do to them? Trust me, it will touch them, but not in a good way. Having come from a very horrific childhood, I know first hand what it does to children. A child might have both parents in the home, but if there is no security there, no safety, no open affection, nobody taking time to fill their needs, the child, in every sense of the word, is alone.
  Whatever you decide to do, know I am in your corner always, your wife's too. Pray first, my friend, before doing anything else. God is so much wiser than we are.

ALL THINGS WORK FOR OUR GOOD

 When I was nine I was bored, and becoming a pest to the adults around me, so my uncle gave me an old clock to tinker with. I held it to my ear, while listening to it's soft ticking sound, and then, being curious, I took it apart. I was too young to understand what made it tick, but did discover that it took many different parts to make the clock work as it should.
    
Like the clock, a man requires more than one part if he is to function properly, and be able to cope with the realities of life. He could not possess just one part and be complete; could not, for instance just have patience. If patience was all he had, what would he do if he found himself in a situation that required courage or faith? What if he were to need compassion, or understanding. wisdom, mercy, or strength? We need a lot of parts in order to not just cope with the harshness of life, but to be able to appreciate, and value it as well.
  
The world our wonderful God created is made up of opposites: night-day, sorrow-joy, spring-winter, etc. We could never appreciate the more colorful one, the one that makes us happy, unless we've first tasted the bitterness of the trials we've experienced.
God does not always send the trials we're confronted with, but he most definitely allows them. How else could He make sure that we have the parts we'd need in order to overcome the difficulties in our lives, as well as be a blessing to those around us who are hurting? Yes, there is a harshness to life; much pain and enormous sorrow, but there is always their opposite.
  
Whenever I see a rainbow, I see the darker colors as the trials I've been through, the brighter colors, as joy; the JOY  God gave me for trusting Him during the  darkest moments of my life: the death of my parents, a betrayal, a failed marriage, having a child in an abusive relationship for years, the loss of a very dear friend, a job, two precious children in trouble.
My greatest JOY fills me up, and that JOY comes from HE who believed in me, loved me, forgave me, when nobody else could- or would.

All Things Work Together For Good To Them That Love God. Romans 8:28

What a powerful blessing, what reassuring words to a troubled person, somebody not understanding what it takes for us to function properly, not understanding what we need, in order to cope with the hard side of life.
   It says all things (WORK), which means everything has been checked out, nothing
will break down and leave us stranded. It means all things are working (NOW), at this
very minute, and for our good.
   It means we have no reason to doubt or be troubled about the trials we are facing. Each part is necessary in order for us to be successful; to grow, and become the kind
of people God desires us to be.
  
   AND WE KNOW (we are positve)

  THAT ALL THINGS (every single thing)
  WORK TOGETHER FOR GOOD (not evil)

  TO WHO? ( to those who love the Lord).
 
 
Let's not worry and fret any more, but give our burdens to the Lord.
We have but to say, "Father, this is just to heavy for me."
He is more than willing to carry it.

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Hope you remember that each day is a gift just waiting to be unwrapped.